Of the marriages that I have seen end in divorce, I estimate that a third of the time an affair is the reason. Due to the newness and false passion with an affair partner, the marital couple often has little chance of restoring the relationship. Shown below are 7 Steps to hopefully prevent an affair.
1. Understand that every spouse is capable of being unfaithful. We read in the Bible that King David, “a man after God’s own heart,” committed adultery.
2. You can never have 100% trust in your spouse. From betrayed partners I have heard numerous times, “I thought my spouse was 100% trustworthy.” The goal is always the upper 90th percentile but no partner ever achieves 100%.
3. Relationships are bank accounts with deposits and withdrawals. With affair partners, there are almost no withdrawals. Limit your innocent deposits with friends of the opposite sex.
4. Watch your social media deposits. Text messages, emails, quick phone calls, etc. can easily lead to unfaithfulness. Due to social media, I have actually seen affairs start with old friends in another state resulting in a divorce.
5. Never have any secrets in your marriage. Secrets hurt relationships and affairs start in secrecy.
6. Know your spouse’s passwords. One of the best ways to overcome secrecy is to know each other’s passwords and make your cell phone and email an “open book.”
7. In Proverbs 4:23, God tells spouses to “guard your thoughts.” Continually be on your guard against words and behaviors that may lead to unfaithfulness.
This Week: Sit down with your spouse and discuss together the 7 steps to prevent an affair.